Education
Perspectives on Parenting©
by Nancy Lambert Davenport


Nancy Davenport's Column:
For Richardson News 09-24-00
Copyright Nancy Lambert Davenport 2000


"First impressions hopeful at start of school: How to make school a win-win"


I attended a meeting with a friend recently. Over a period of three hours, a committee created her child's new Individual Education Plan for the school year.

The heart of the document they created was this: her child would be fully included in a regular education class -- with support from the district's special services department.

My friend was well prepared with lists and ideas as well as abundant enthusiasm. She has high expectations for her child, as well as for the people who teach him. She expected the teachers to be educated, experienced and resourceful.

Thankfully, they also were obviously both competent and creative. Otherwise, I can tell you, they would have felt like the coyote in the cartoons after a steamroller had passed over him.

Some people may think, 'Oh, those poor teachers.' Why? Why should a parent not have high expectations of his child's teachers? Why should parents be satisfied with mediocrity just because they hear sad stories about low pay and long hours?

I taught high school a million years ago, and we told the same stories then with great moanings and groanings. Yes, we should pay teachers more, but that does not excuse them from doing a good job.

In addition, at the meeting, I observed something even more important. My friend was confident that she had succeeded in teaching her young child with disabilities how to behave. Without hesitation, she signed the IEP on the dotted line that her child would be disciplined in the same manner as everyone else in the class.

Just because a committee determines that a child is speech-impaired or mentally retarded doesn't mean he cannot learn how to behave. (Of course there are some disabilities that directly affect behavior for which specific modification techniques must be written in the IEP.) It is abusive to allow a child with disabilities to misbehave without immediate discipline.

I thought it was important that everyone brought something to the table at this meeting. The teachers came prepared to teach a child with disabilities in a regular classroom to the best of their abilities, but the parents also contributed by sending children who respect authority in an age-appropriate manner, who know and respond to the word "no" and will not throw themselves on the floor when they do not get their way.

Everyone is going to win, even the other kids, who will receive a lifetime experience of knowing a peer with disabilities as a friend. How many of us adults can say that?

We can all be proud of our education system as it worked at the table that day. Everyone is going to benefit and grow - parents, teachers, peers, and, of course, the student.




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Nancy Lambert Davenport
EMAIL: nancdave@swbell.net
URL: http://www.nancyldavenport.com